Who is your tribe?

In sitting here thinking about what to tell you about gratitude today that might be an inspiration.   I am compelled to share that I was blessed to spend some time with my "tribe" this weekend - you know, that community of people that just "get you" - warts and all! These are the people I suggest you seek out immediately if possible - before you become depleted. I feel amazingly recharged and HOPE you will too.

I am hopeful that you know who I am taking about in your own life but if you are just too low to even name them in your head I am referring to those people you know that leave you feeling uplifted - like you are a better person for having been in their presence! Take a minute and get the picture of them in your head...now BREATHE for a moment...hold it...and let it out. Make a plan to connect with one of those people. Put it in your phone as a reminder - every day if you need to be prompted but max 3 days. Coffee, Skype, Facebook...LIVE and in person, even!

 

It is VERY important to take care of YOU! I believe this will bring you some peace in your heart which lends itself to being grateful. Once there, you can share it with the world and be there for others feeling low or depleted.  There is a bible verse that states perseverance leads to character and character HOPE! HOPE, being my favorite word and the reason I am grateful every day for every thing, is the reason for this blog. I want to share my HOPE for you and  lift you up! I really know you can reach out and make a connection - be bold and brave. :)

 

So, I'd love to hear from you...my very few readers...and I'd love to hear who you contacted/connected with and if it helped fill you up!

Hurry Up And Wait

So, do you ever get annoyed when you have to wait- like at the grocery store, a red light? I'm sitting at the car dealer for a recall for an intolerable amount of time...two hours! I want to be anywhere but "stuck" here...home doing the chores most days I hate...walking my dogs...preparing for dinner...ANYTHING!

Do you get the feeling I don't sit still well? I definitely do not! Do you?

God asks us to wait on him, his timing and grrr, I get soo inpatient! With God, the source of all the wonderful blessings in my life if you can believe! I know that God's timing is perfect and that even my waiting here-using Toyota's internet and iPad, sitting in their air conditioned showroom, with coffee and snacks available, serves a purpose.

For me, I think that purpose is to slow down! I'm terrible at it and even when my body is slow (most days) my mind races and races, effectively making me ineffective! The very opposite of what God wants in my life. Your's too!

So today, I'm going to try and be grateful for the quiet times of having to wait. Maybe if I listen I will hear. Maybe I'll be effective in fulfilling my purpose...for me that is to help others. I need to be available and operating at a reasonable pace to do so. Additionally, I can be thankful in the quiet times, those I feel stuck in, for the blessings in having zero drama to manage at that moment. I can just sit here and blog...

Can anyone relate??? What can you do with that time when you feel stuck, waiting? Love to hear your replies! :)

NEw YEars REsolutions?

Did you make one NEw YEars REsolution? Two? Twenty two? How are you doing almost one month in? It is my HOPE you are rocking it! Approximately 45% of the American public make resolutions and I was surprised to find out, many are successful in attaining them.  In fact, statistics show when you make a specific, measurable goal, you are MUCH more likely to keep it (them).  Here are some reminders as we get through January! Obvious I admit, but we are dusting off to keep motivated, right?

First, let's take a look and ensure we choose goals that are attainable, specific and measurable.  Did you resolve to lose weight? nine million pounds or 10% of your body weight - whatever percentage is smart for you of course.  Do you want to write a book? Blog? Have you a written plan for doing so, one page/day at a time? Do you have a path mapped out for reaching your goal? Before bed tonight, take a minute to ensure you have a specific plan!

Second, I would look around at your ACCOUNTABILITY partners.  Who are you brave enough to confide in that you know will support you in reaching your goals? Better still, some resolutions (like weight loss for example - a quick Google search shows this is the #1 resolution made by Americans! - beg for a friend to go along with you. You can encourage each other through each workout/dietary change, etc., to help you succeed! Make sure the people you surround yourself with (true in every aspect of life, not just with inspiration for resolutions!) are POSITIVE! OMGosh! How many of us have been dragged down by someone's negative energy, or worse, believed the ugly's that others have spouted on occasion. A resolution in itself - to stay motivated and positive, you need to be surrounded by supportive people!

Last, I would remember to not lose HOPE!  Even when discouraged or feel like giving up, remember there is always HOPE.  You can breathe, give yourself a break for being human, be gentle to yourself and START AGAIN!!! Sometimes I have to do this several times in a day depending on what is going on. As far as New Years resolutions, PLEASE resolve to be HOPEFUL!


I know it's simple but if you remember to be specific in your goals, have good people surround you, stay positive and hopeful and I am sure you can stay inspired!!! Keep on rocking your goal for 2014!


On a side note, I'm one of the 20% or so of  Americans that don't make an official resolution, but since knowing (finally) my purpose in life is to help others, I am constantly trying to identify (and be open to) doing so in new ways! May God bless you richly! :)

Happy Thanksgiving!

Today is a day to be grateful...which is what this blog is all about - HOPE and gratitude! I HOPE you are thankful for all the blessings in your life and I challenge you to make a gratitude list EVERYDAY! There is a saying that says something like: "What if you woke tomorrow with only the things you were thankful (to God) for today?" That would certainly change your perspective and priority on gratitude, no?

So, there it is...my challenge for you starting today...the day before the real craziness of the holiday season starts. Don't forget to breathe and be thankful for all you have!

In Thanks! :)nattie

Thank you to http://www.pinterest.com/AtOfGratitude/gratitude-image-quotes/ for the cool image on pinterest!

The glass IS half full!

Ever know someone who just oozes positivity?  Strive to be that person!  I heard from a friend today who fits this bill for me and I am just blessed beyond measure she called today.  I feel instantly lifted up, up, UP!

This week marks on year since my dear friend, mentor and life coach type cheerleader succumbed to his cancer and my heart is sad for the loss and for his wife, children and grands.  I miss his positivity and how it impacted me...sometimes we take for granted those in our lives while they are here. Take a moment to remember all that you have to be grateful for and be a cheerleader and positive role model when you can. 

It's ok to rest when you need to or lean, but when you can...send a little positivity  out into the world...I know it will send HOPE back in spades!

RIP GB, you are dear to me :)

Bloom where you are planted!

You are where you are for a reason – you might not know the who, what, when, where, and why exactly,  but I believe you are to be a blessing wherever you find yourself. 

 

Are you in a bright place in life? Use your light to touch someone else who may be struggling.  

When you find yourself in a dark spot, use what energy you have to take time to heal first (self- care)! Then, when you find you are able to move forward, even slowly, see if you cannot be the light someone else needs to see in their dark spot.

Don’t forget that we are all connected, there is always hope and even under the crappiest of circumstances there is something to be thankful for. 

In what way can you use your gifts today – RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE – to show someone else some HOPE?

Special gifts! TGIF!

TGIF!

 What about a gift???

 

Today is just a quick reminder that you have many talents and strengths! Go out into the world – at work, at home, wherever you are and use those to bless someone!  Doesn’t have to be HUGE -  I plan on cutting a friends hair today – just use YOUR SPECIAL GIFTS to be a blessing to someone, somewhere!!! Yesterday a friend dusted my ceiling fans...a job I cannot DO that was such a blessing to me!

How much more awesome will the world be if we all do this one thing!

GRATEFUL for your visit, HOPE to hear from you soon! :)

A smile to go!

Try if you can to keep a smile on your face.  I know it can hard, but the old adage “fake it till you make it” applies here! This little thing, if you will, changes not only how you feel over time, but changes people’s perception of you. Are you open or closed? Are you happy (a choice moment to moment) or not? Do you want to be more approachable, available to help others? Then this little tip is for you.

When I was sick I remember smiling when the lab sat 24 vials next to my arm…24! I weighed like 99 pounds! Was I smiling because I was happy or content? NOPE! Just the opposite, I was smiling so I would feel brave, more reachable (sometimes YOU are the one who need to be open to receive help) and maybe, just maybe to help someone else…there were lots of littles there at the cancer center…maybe they felt one little smidge less terrified by seeing an adult smile - not a wide open teeth showing kind of fake smile, just a small little hopeful smile. Sometimes it is eternally helpful to get your mangled in a stress ball insides to match your outside (remember that smile, right?)!

At any rate, take a minute to plaster a small smile on your face when faced with someone you don’t care for, a situation that is uncomfortable for you in some way, or even just because. YOUR smile might just be the HOPE someone needs to be ok with today. You never know what it might offer to the universe…or what it might bring back your way. I know there are many of you struggling and I know this can be particularly hard on a bad day…just try it and give yourself permission to be human if you don’t remember every time…when you can, try it and see how it feels!

I am thankful for you stopping by today! For you lurkers reading, I appreciate you…feel free to leave a note, start a conversation or just say Hi! Help me to not feel so lonely as this blog gets off the ground…J

 

Ready for a little CHANGE???

How many of you have had significant challenges in your life?  Feeling down? Life can seem like a real kick in the pants sometimes, can’t it?  Since I started this blog with HOPE and gratitude in mind – two of my favorite things - I thought I would suggest the following prescription for CHANGE and see if it works for you. Sometimes the simple reminders help the most.  Doing these little things on a daily basis can add up to big, positive successes in these areas. 
Remember to be open to a little C-H-A-N-G-E.                                          

 

Commit – Commit to a path that lifts you up! Surround yourself with positive people involved in positive things. Examine your life, which areas lift and which lean? You can work to reduce the heaviness in the leaning areas and spend more time cultivating the uplifting ones!

HOPE – Always keep HOPE tucked in your heart – no one can take it from you and it cannot be squelched, as long as you carefully guard it. During times of stress it’s easy to throw your hands up in despair and give up everything…but I believe even under the most challenging circumstances, there is always HOPE!

Attitude – You can choose to be happy and ok (do you know its ok, just to be ok? A lesson one of my kiddos is still working on…when there is no drama and no stress going on when you are used to that) It is OK just to be! The choice is solely yours – when you wake up in the morning, choose to maintain a positive attitude!

Gratitude – Try saying (out loud or in your head) immediately upon awakening, “Dear Lord, I am thankful…” You can say what you are thankful for or leave it at that. I am thankful…See if this little shift doesn’t make a huge difference…even if you don’t believe in God (and I FIRMLY do), you can send gratitude out into the world…it makes a HUMONGUOUS difference!

Excellence – Take a moment (or a day) to examine your strengths and weaknesses and commit to cultivating those areas you excel.  Mind you I did not and do not mean PERFECTIONISM!!! As a recovering perfectionist, I am learning how to cultivate my strengths while enjoying the process. I am also approaching my weaknesses from a different perspective – instead of trying to “get significantly better” at the things I do not consider my strengths; I do a better job at giving myself permission to be human and just manage those areas a little better.

For instance: I do not consider myself a great housekeeper, so instead of striving to push    myself to exhaustion or desperation in an area I am not great at (I do not believe this is a learned skill as much as I do believe some are more organized by nature) I am learning to manage this just a little better. By taking little steps that add up to positive changes (and less stress) for me, I can be more more successful in this area! Thank you to the blogger at www.flylady.net for her simple approach helping to keep me on track :)! Managing areas of weakness ultimately allows more time to develop those things you excel at - which is what you want!

Please know I am not saying it will ever be PERFECT or happen overnight but sometimes having a checklist in your head, helps. Try the CHANGE I outline here. I’d love to hear from you some success stories…

 

Please be patient!

I had a friend who needed some pictures turned around quickly...she is an amazing gal and the pictures were for a project benefitting the American Cancer Society...I was honored to help but couldnt find time to blog

I will be more didligent next week! :)

Choose to be grateful

Being grateful is a choice…

You can roll out of bed in the morning groaning, grumbling and hating life or you can roll out of bed and be thankful for the things in your life!

I choose to be thankful for the blessings in mine because even on the darkest day in the darkest hour I believe there is always something to be thankful for and that there is ALWAYS, ALWAYS HOPE!

I am reminded of my favorite bible verse - Romans 8:28 that says

"...all things work for good for those who love the Lord, those called according to His purpose". I meditated on this hopeful verse over and over during my fight through cancer and subsequent bone marrow transplant and it helped me choose to see the sunny side of things even when I felt like crap, looked like crap and barfed in a bucket all day long.  Even if you are not a christian (and at one time in my life I was dead set against religion, but today you couldn't shake me from my faith!) you can hide this HOPE away in your heart and see if it doesn't give you a little peace!

 

 

Make the choice today, this minute, to be grateful and I know that you will notice more blessings and less pain, more joy and less drama…Try it for today and let me know how you feel! I’d love to hear from you J

Random Acts of Kindness!

Today is a day for some random acts of kindness…I have participated in a 29gifts.org  (check out the blog at http://www.29gifts.org/) cycle and I woke up thinking about how I can 1) serve others and 2) help someone feel good today. I have already beaten the weeds in the yard into submission and so now I am on to my day’s goal to serve others in this fashion!

I think nothing helps someone to feel good more than having someone do something nice for them! The fact that it is from a stranger gives them a moment to think too about the giving/receiving part – perhaps prompting them to pay it forward also! For me this has been the case in my experience on those occasions when I have been the recipient of someone else’s kindness.

Would you share your day – well, let’s make it two…and what you did, received, thought about! Today is about HOPE and giving and I’m thankful to be a part of it! :)nattie

What can little girls teach you?

Good Morning and welcome to this edition of Hope on Hand!

Today I wanted to comment on how awesome babies are!  Specifically girl babies...this post is not to offend baby boys or their rough and tumble awesomeness, but as I roll up to this weekends festivities for a dear friend who has had a tough time and pregnancy all I can say is YIPEE!, WOOHOO! HOW totally exciting to be part of this little baby girl (to be's) life...

Ten tiny fingers and toes, teeny tiny little button nose, happy little smiles, frilly outfits and bows...all for the little baby girl to be! WOO!

What can a baby girl teach you?



* That pink really is an awesome color (besides being one of my personal favs!) and you shoiuld find a little pink every day...it's such a happy color!
*That you never really know just how tightly wrapped daddies can be until they have a baby girl
*That just one little smile can melt the coldest (most grinchiest) heart - look around - you've seen them at the mall...all crabbed out till a tiny stroller goes by trailing pink and frilly...their eyes kind of glaze over for a moment...and then a smile!
* That even though babies are in 0-3 months clothng for the blink of an eye you happily overpay for yet another oh so adorable tiny little frock because it's cuter than the others!

I asked one of the BESTEST little girl daddies I know for a quote and here it is hot off the presses:

" Pretty girls don't touch gross things"...I'm told this by my brother who tells this to his baby girl when she wants to help him take out the trash...

Ok, so it only relates a smidge, but I asked for the quote!

So today, let's celebrate baby girls and pray for the strong women they will become! The world is filled with so much HOPE!

Let's hear what your little girls have taught you! (someday, someone, somewhere will be following this blog (thank you Sandy - my first "official" follower) and will comment...tell a friend...share it? Just say no to crickets! :)

***An additional quote!!! my more related to the story*** "You're the end of the rainbow, my pot of gold, you're daddy's little girl to have and hold" - Much better! :)

Multi ethnic families and ignorance!

Today I want to blog on a controversial (yikes!) topic! As I consider adopting another child…

Why does it seem to me that it is more “socially acceptable” to adopt a child that is a different race than you when they originated out of another country (perhaps due to natural disaster) than it seems when you adopt out of foster care?  I know there is ignorance and prejudice but I cannot believe in 2013 that people just assume mom was a “crack mom” (I face this issue occasionally with one of my children)… as if race has ANYTHING to do with the drug addiction epidemic in this country!  AND WHY does it seem like having a child who doesn’t “match” makes people think its ok to come out and ask if mom “was on drugs”, like the juicy story they are conjuring up matters one little iota to this tiny child at this time…Seriously, it’s the equivalent of my asking them if they still have their foreskin (pardon the crass!)

I know many and I mean MANY awesome families that have multiple ethnicities in them.  Why are people still so shallow?  I believe our country still has a long way to go in how we treat one another. 

I know in this forum I am supposed to share hope (and I hope I do!), but sometimes with issues close to the heart, discussing them openly offers hope! Hope that every child finds the right place in the world for them. Hope that people respect your choices enough to bite their tongues. Hope that the world can change one family at a time! Teach your kids respect and love them so that someday they can share their HOPE with others…

Being grateful!

Ok, so today is a tiny, short little reminder about perspective and being grateful...

It is (for me) a sure sign that God has changed my heart when I look out the window at the hurricane like conditions and the first thoughts that go through my mind are 1) I sure am glad we are already home for the day - swim lessons having been cancelled and 2) that the good news about the storm is that the (parched) plants need a good soak! 

I remember before my diagnosis and illness when I would feel like this kind of weather was "a waste" or somehow just got life derailed - a big bummer!  So, I'm changing...for the better...and the world is a happier place!

What in your life has changed for the better when you became aware that your perspective regarding a a circumstance has shifted?

What you need to know about marrow donation

5 things you need to know about marrow donation: 

1)      It doesn’t cost anything but time – 5 minutes to complete packet to register, if you are called there may be several appointments, but they are at NO COST  to you

2)      You get to be a live donor – to be certain I LOVE ALL ORGAN, TISSUE AND BLOOD DONORS, THOSE WHO ARE ALIVE, THOSE WHO HAVE CHOSEN TO DONATE PRIOR TO THEIR DEATH AND THOSE FAMILIES WHO MAKE THE AGONIZING DECISION AFTER HAVING LOST A LOVED ONE – BUT, you can do this today, now…someone is waiting!

3)      To get on the registry takes just a cheek swab – you get a kit in the mail, swab and send back…

4)      I saw someone YESTERDAY on FB that is STILL WAITING for a match so he can have a chance to cure his cancer!!!! It seems sooo unlikely this is POSSIBLE but there it is…

5)      You might be a hero! You can actually save a LIFE!!! Imagine being able to meet the person you helped (in the US the time frame varies – for me it was on year, and in many cases you can communicate anonymously for the first year) and watch them go on to prosper – maybe it’s a child, a momma, grandpa, a sister, your family member...good karma all around!

For more complete information go to: http://marrow.org/Join/Join_Now/Join_Now.aspx

If you choose to donate, please tell me about your experiences. If you are already a donor or have donated, feel free to share so you can help inform others…

 

A little feedback please!

For those of you who are visiting (maybe for the first time), would you mind leaving some constructive feedback - I'd like to be useful and hopeful and beneficial in the world so if you have something to say (gently please!) I 'd like to hear it...I'm new at this and have ALOT to learn.

 

Inquiring minds want to know! :)

Are the bad guys winning??? Is there any HOPE at all?

Today I have hope that the bad guys will NOT win! Do you think they will win? I certainly hate turning on the TV or opening the paper only to see the most AWFUL news available…children being stolen – how about for A DECADE, cops shot, the gang violence in and out of prison, the politicians at each other’s throat.  How about we all remember that we are connected? That we are supposed to love one another as well as we love ourselves? That we all inhabit the same planet?

I know that to many this sounds a bit Pollyanna – ish, but SHEESH! What kind of dump are we leaving for our children to learn and grow up in? I for one know that we are all here to help one another and that it is our jobs to teach our children right from wrong versus the seeming culture of entitlement going on today.  I will say this sounds like a bit of a rant and it is NOT meant that way, so, let me share some good news today:

I know someone who is recovering nicely after their recent bone marrow transplant

I know of someone who got help today for a SERIOUS challenge they were facing, asked for help, and took a step in the right direction.

I know someone who had some good news in their fight with ovarian cancer

I know someone who graduated from a RT program to help others

I know someone who…

 

Who do you know with HOPE to share? Keep their names anonymous if you want but I’d love to hear from you…

 

My 8th re-birthday and Friday the 13th, May 2005

The nurse says: “your cells are here”…it was this nurse – I wish I can recall her name because she was awesome and fun and made me less nervous. The bag of stem cells was being hooked into the mass of tubes that were attached to me now and making their journey in an attempt to save my life.  As I watched them creep through the tube towards my Hickman catheter I was terrified, almost afraid to breathe…what if it hurts, what if it doesn’t work, what if I go through all this and still die, what if I don’t get to see my (then 4yo) son again? A thousand what ifs had gone through my mind as I watched the infusion start!

However, all of these thoughts and all of my fears were pointless because though I’d like to say that I was brave, that I perhaps had other choices I could make, I was not and did not.  This HAD to work - I was given approximately a year to live and then bucket loads of chemo to essentially “kill off” the old me and replace the diseased and dying cells with healthy ones…all while the doctors hit the reset button and, as I secretly suspected (which is not really all that funny – more dark than anything), had their fingers crossed behind their backs.  Then the waiting game…my journey into the unknown had begun!  The infusion ended at 3am on Friday the 13^th of May 2005 which became my day zero (a re-birthday for those who have been transplanted). 

Fast forward to today, May 13, 2013! It’s been eight years from that scary and hopeful day and though I can say I will likely never understand all the science involved in making it work, I definitely can say that no, the infusion itself DOES NOT HURT, that it did indeed work (a million thanks to my awesome bone marrow donor, Laurie Yankie for giving the gift of life to a complete stranger) and that my son is going to be 13 this year! WooHoo! I am considered both “cured” and my transplant a complete success…

I met a lot of people at transplant who did not make it and my heartfelt prayers go out to those families. I know human bodies get tired and your loved ones fought so hard! To those still fighting (and I know many) I offer my never ending love and support and want you to fight dirty! Kick, scream, and spit – kick its ass!

For others who may be reading (please share with your friends) would you consider becoming a blood or marrow donor? I am living proof of your gifts! Go to www.marrow.org or www.bethematch.org to get registerd on the National Marrow Donor Registry (NMDR).

More to come!

 

 

Why I Liked Being a Foster Parent

I am including this here as it was my first attempt at being published on infobarrel.com. Unfortunately they denied it (due to it being better suited I guess for a personal blog)...so...HOPE in HAND (already written and edited)...May it inspire you! :)

Being a foster parent is a rewarding way to give back to children who have been exposed to neglect or abuse. They deserve a safe place to try to heal while their parents (or other family members) try to get their lives back on track. Most often the children go back to family once it's safe to do so and then, less frequently, they take the path towards adoption. I have had the pleasure of parenting many children who have been reunified and lucky enough to have adopted one out of the foster care system. Both sets of experiences have helped shape my life and who I am today and I want to share some of the many blessings here so that if you are ever looking for a way to give back, you might consider becoming a foster parent.

More often than not after someone hears that I am a foster parent, they say something along the lines of - " I could never DO that! How can you give them up?" My answer has always been that "you just love them"...struggling and scared as they might be, you just love them right where they are. Some children come to you with a lot of baggage, and others less, but this is an opportunity to give back to those who don't always have a voice for themselves. You have to have compassion and an open heart when the kids are tough (and some are!) however, for me, the experience of being a foster parent has been far more rewarding than I could have ever expected. Whether the child stays for a moment or a lifetime, there are blessings!

Most foster children are ultimately reunified with their families. For these kiddos I have provided a period in time (ranging from a few days - my shortest was only 4 days for a child whom I was told had no extended family and the longest stay, well, its been 6 years and counting!) where they had a safe place to land and be a kid amidst whatever crisis their family was working through. I feel that this is the biggest point I can make - they are children and are only little once. So let's let them be little!

As for the sweetie I have parented for over 6 years now through several failed attempts at reunification with birth family, I just pray. I pray as hard as I can that as I watch this child grow up and struggle with a hard reality that when the times comes to once again to let go I can "just love" the child. It's likely that sometime in the near future I will get a call asking to be a safe place for this kiddo once more. The merry-go-round that is this child's life has been hard on both of us - it's aged me quite frankly - but with an open heart I believe obstacles can and will be overcome and this experience has been no different!

Lastly, for the one child I have been blessed to have adopted out of foster care, I will always be thankful for the birth parents! For you see - though I started this journey in hopes of finding a way to give back for all that I have been given, I have received blessings many times over. For this one child I never have to give up, I can continue to "just love him" as long as I live! YAY!

The experience of parenting children in both short and long-term foster placements has been amazing! There are alot of kiddos that need safe homes and that there are many foster parent angels that make me look like a slacker (in terms of the sheer numbers of kiddos they have helped) but overall I am thankful for the experience and blessing that has come from both the giving and receiving that being a foster parent has provided in my life. These are the reasons I like being a foster parent. Maybe you could open your heart and home?

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