Choose to be grateful

Being grateful is a choice…

You can roll out of bed in the morning groaning, grumbling and hating life or you can roll out of bed and be thankful for the things in your life!

I choose to be thankful for the blessings in mine because even on the darkest day in the darkest hour I believe there is always something to be thankful for and that there is ALWAYS, ALWAYS HOPE!

I am reminded of my favorite bible verse - Romans 8:28 that says

"...all things work for good for those who love the Lord, those called according to His purpose". I meditated on this hopeful verse over and over during my fight through cancer and subsequent bone marrow transplant and it helped me choose to see the sunny side of things even when I felt like crap, looked like crap and barfed in a bucket all day long.  Even if you are not a christian (and at one time in my life I was dead set against religion, but today you couldn't shake me from my faith!) you can hide this HOPE away in your heart and see if it doesn't give you a little peace!

 

 

Make the choice today, this minute, to be grateful and I know that you will notice more blessings and less pain, more joy and less drama…Try it for today and let me know how you feel! I’d love to hear from you J

Random Acts of Kindness!

Today is a day for some random acts of kindness…I have participated in a 29gifts.org  (check out the blog at http://www.29gifts.org/) cycle and I woke up thinking about how I can 1) serve others and 2) help someone feel good today. I have already beaten the weeds in the yard into submission and so now I am on to my day’s goal to serve others in this fashion!

I think nothing helps someone to feel good more than having someone do something nice for them! The fact that it is from a stranger gives them a moment to think too about the giving/receiving part – perhaps prompting them to pay it forward also! For me this has been the case in my experience on those occasions when I have been the recipient of someone else’s kindness.

Would you share your day – well, let’s make it two…and what you did, received, thought about! Today is about HOPE and giving and I’m thankful to be a part of it! :)nattie

What can little girls teach you?

Good Morning and welcome to this edition of Hope on Hand!

Today I wanted to comment on how awesome babies are!  Specifically girl babies...this post is not to offend baby boys or their rough and tumble awesomeness, but as I roll up to this weekends festivities for a dear friend who has had a tough time and pregnancy all I can say is YIPEE!, WOOHOO! HOW totally exciting to be part of this little baby girl (to be's) life...

Ten tiny fingers and toes, teeny tiny little button nose, happy little smiles, frilly outfits and bows...all for the little baby girl to be! WOO!

What can a baby girl teach you?



* That pink really is an awesome color (besides being one of my personal favs!) and you shoiuld find a little pink every day...it's such a happy color!
*That you never really know just how tightly wrapped daddies can be until they have a baby girl
*That just one little smile can melt the coldest (most grinchiest) heart - look around - you've seen them at the mall...all crabbed out till a tiny stroller goes by trailing pink and frilly...their eyes kind of glaze over for a moment...and then a smile!
* That even though babies are in 0-3 months clothng for the blink of an eye you happily overpay for yet another oh so adorable tiny little frock because it's cuter than the others!

I asked one of the BESTEST little girl daddies I know for a quote and here it is hot off the presses:

" Pretty girls don't touch gross things"...I'm told this by my brother who tells this to his baby girl when she wants to help him take out the trash...

Ok, so it only relates a smidge, but I asked for the quote!

So today, let's celebrate baby girls and pray for the strong women they will become! The world is filled with so much HOPE!

Let's hear what your little girls have taught you! (someday, someone, somewhere will be following this blog (thank you Sandy - my first "official" follower) and will comment...tell a friend...share it? Just say no to crickets! :)

***An additional quote!!! my more related to the story*** "You're the end of the rainbow, my pot of gold, you're daddy's little girl to have and hold" - Much better! :)

Multi ethnic families and ignorance!

Today I want to blog on a controversial (yikes!) topic! As I consider adopting another child…

Why does it seem to me that it is more “socially acceptable” to adopt a child that is a different race than you when they originated out of another country (perhaps due to natural disaster) than it seems when you adopt out of foster care?  I know there is ignorance and prejudice but I cannot believe in 2013 that people just assume mom was a “crack mom” (I face this issue occasionally with one of my children)… as if race has ANYTHING to do with the drug addiction epidemic in this country!  AND WHY does it seem like having a child who doesn’t “match” makes people think its ok to come out and ask if mom “was on drugs”, like the juicy story they are conjuring up matters one little iota to this tiny child at this time…Seriously, it’s the equivalent of my asking them if they still have their foreskin (pardon the crass!)

I know many and I mean MANY awesome families that have multiple ethnicities in them.  Why are people still so shallow?  I believe our country still has a long way to go in how we treat one another. 

I know in this forum I am supposed to share hope (and I hope I do!), but sometimes with issues close to the heart, discussing them openly offers hope! Hope that every child finds the right place in the world for them. Hope that people respect your choices enough to bite their tongues. Hope that the world can change one family at a time! Teach your kids respect and love them so that someday they can share their HOPE with others…

Being grateful!

Ok, so today is a tiny, short little reminder about perspective and being grateful...

It is (for me) a sure sign that God has changed my heart when I look out the window at the hurricane like conditions and the first thoughts that go through my mind are 1) I sure am glad we are already home for the day - swim lessons having been cancelled and 2) that the good news about the storm is that the (parched) plants need a good soak! 

I remember before my diagnosis and illness when I would feel like this kind of weather was "a waste" or somehow just got life derailed - a big bummer!  So, I'm changing...for the better...and the world is a happier place!

What in your life has changed for the better when you became aware that your perspective regarding a a circumstance has shifted?

What you need to know about marrow donation

5 things you need to know about marrow donation: 

1)      It doesn’t cost anything but time – 5 minutes to complete packet to register, if you are called there may be several appointments, but they are at NO COST  to you

2)      You get to be a live donor – to be certain I LOVE ALL ORGAN, TISSUE AND BLOOD DONORS, THOSE WHO ARE ALIVE, THOSE WHO HAVE CHOSEN TO DONATE PRIOR TO THEIR DEATH AND THOSE FAMILIES WHO MAKE THE AGONIZING DECISION AFTER HAVING LOST A LOVED ONE – BUT, you can do this today, now…someone is waiting!

3)      To get on the registry takes just a cheek swab – you get a kit in the mail, swab and send back…

4)      I saw someone YESTERDAY on FB that is STILL WAITING for a match so he can have a chance to cure his cancer!!!! It seems sooo unlikely this is POSSIBLE but there it is…

5)      You might be a hero! You can actually save a LIFE!!! Imagine being able to meet the person you helped (in the US the time frame varies – for me it was on year, and in many cases you can communicate anonymously for the first year) and watch them go on to prosper – maybe it’s a child, a momma, grandpa, a sister, your family member...good karma all around!

For more complete information go to: http://marrow.org/Join/Join_Now/Join_Now.aspx

If you choose to donate, please tell me about your experiences. If you are already a donor or have donated, feel free to share so you can help inform others…

 

A little feedback please!

For those of you who are visiting (maybe for the first time), would you mind leaving some constructive feedback - I'd like to be useful and hopeful and beneficial in the world so if you have something to say (gently please!) I 'd like to hear it...I'm new at this and have ALOT to learn.

 

Inquiring minds want to know! :)

Are the bad guys winning??? Is there any HOPE at all?

Today I have hope that the bad guys will NOT win! Do you think they will win? I certainly hate turning on the TV or opening the paper only to see the most AWFUL news available…children being stolen – how about for A DECADE, cops shot, the gang violence in and out of prison, the politicians at each other’s throat.  How about we all remember that we are connected? That we are supposed to love one another as well as we love ourselves? That we all inhabit the same planet?

I know that to many this sounds a bit Pollyanna – ish, but SHEESH! What kind of dump are we leaving for our children to learn and grow up in? I for one know that we are all here to help one another and that it is our jobs to teach our children right from wrong versus the seeming culture of entitlement going on today.  I will say this sounds like a bit of a rant and it is NOT meant that way, so, let me share some good news today:

I know someone who is recovering nicely after their recent bone marrow transplant

I know of someone who got help today for a SERIOUS challenge they were facing, asked for help, and took a step in the right direction.

I know someone who had some good news in their fight with ovarian cancer

I know someone who graduated from a RT program to help others

I know someone who…

 

Who do you know with HOPE to share? Keep their names anonymous if you want but I’d love to hear from you…

 

My 8th re-birthday and Friday the 13th, May 2005

The nurse says: “your cells are here”…it was this nurse – I wish I can recall her name because she was awesome and fun and made me less nervous. The bag of stem cells was being hooked into the mass of tubes that were attached to me now and making their journey in an attempt to save my life.  As I watched them creep through the tube towards my Hickman catheter I was terrified, almost afraid to breathe…what if it hurts, what if it doesn’t work, what if I go through all this and still die, what if I don’t get to see my (then 4yo) son again? A thousand what ifs had gone through my mind as I watched the infusion start!

However, all of these thoughts and all of my fears were pointless because though I’d like to say that I was brave, that I perhaps had other choices I could make, I was not and did not.  This HAD to work - I was given approximately a year to live and then bucket loads of chemo to essentially “kill off” the old me and replace the diseased and dying cells with healthy ones…all while the doctors hit the reset button and, as I secretly suspected (which is not really all that funny – more dark than anything), had their fingers crossed behind their backs.  Then the waiting game…my journey into the unknown had begun!  The infusion ended at 3am on Friday the 13^th of May 2005 which became my day zero (a re-birthday for those who have been transplanted). 

Fast forward to today, May 13, 2013! It’s been eight years from that scary and hopeful day and though I can say I will likely never understand all the science involved in making it work, I definitely can say that no, the infusion itself DOES NOT HURT, that it did indeed work (a million thanks to my awesome bone marrow donor, Laurie Yankie for giving the gift of life to a complete stranger) and that my son is going to be 13 this year! WooHoo! I am considered both “cured” and my transplant a complete success…

I met a lot of people at transplant who did not make it and my heartfelt prayers go out to those families. I know human bodies get tired and your loved ones fought so hard! To those still fighting (and I know many) I offer my never ending love and support and want you to fight dirty! Kick, scream, and spit – kick its ass!

For others who may be reading (please share with your friends) would you consider becoming a blood or marrow donor? I am living proof of your gifts! Go to www.marrow.org or www.bethematch.org to get registerd on the National Marrow Donor Registry (NMDR).

More to come!

 

 

Why I Liked Being a Foster Parent

I am including this here as it was my first attempt at being published on infobarrel.com. Unfortunately they denied it (due to it being better suited I guess for a personal blog)...so...HOPE in HAND (already written and edited)...May it inspire you! :)

Being a foster parent is a rewarding way to give back to children who have been exposed to neglect or abuse. They deserve a safe place to try to heal while their parents (or other family members) try to get their lives back on track. Most often the children go back to family once it's safe to do so and then, less frequently, they take the path towards adoption. I have had the pleasure of parenting many children who have been reunified and lucky enough to have adopted one out of the foster care system. Both sets of experiences have helped shape my life and who I am today and I want to share some of the many blessings here so that if you are ever looking for a way to give back, you might consider becoming a foster parent.

More often than not after someone hears that I am a foster parent, they say something along the lines of - " I could never DO that! How can you give them up?" My answer has always been that "you just love them"...struggling and scared as they might be, you just love them right where they are. Some children come to you with a lot of baggage, and others less, but this is an opportunity to give back to those who don't always have a voice for themselves. You have to have compassion and an open heart when the kids are tough (and some are!) however, for me, the experience of being a foster parent has been far more rewarding than I could have ever expected. Whether the child stays for a moment or a lifetime, there are blessings!

Most foster children are ultimately reunified with their families. For these kiddos I have provided a period in time (ranging from a few days - my shortest was only 4 days for a child whom I was told had no extended family and the longest stay, well, its been 6 years and counting!) where they had a safe place to land and be a kid amidst whatever crisis their family was working through. I feel that this is the biggest point I can make - they are children and are only little once. So let's let them be little!

As for the sweetie I have parented for over 6 years now through several failed attempts at reunification with birth family, I just pray. I pray as hard as I can that as I watch this child grow up and struggle with a hard reality that when the times comes to once again to let go I can "just love" the child. It's likely that sometime in the near future I will get a call asking to be a safe place for this kiddo once more. The merry-go-round that is this child's life has been hard on both of us - it's aged me quite frankly - but with an open heart I believe obstacles can and will be overcome and this experience has been no different!

Lastly, for the one child I have been blessed to have adopted out of foster care, I will always be thankful for the birth parents! For you see - though I started this journey in hopes of finding a way to give back for all that I have been given, I have received blessings many times over. For this one child I never have to give up, I can continue to "just love him" as long as I live! YAY!

The experience of parenting children in both short and long-term foster placements has been amazing! There are alot of kiddos that need safe homes and that there are many foster parent angels that make me look like a slacker (in terms of the sheer numbers of kiddos they have helped) but overall I am thankful for the experience and blessing that has come from both the giving and receiving that being a foster parent has provided in my life. These are the reasons I like being a foster parent. Maybe you could open your heart and home?

3

Image

Edit Delete

Welcome back, and pardon the dust!

So, it's been many moons and shame on me for just letting this blog sit here to wither on the vine...I read the post to George Bennett and am fired UP to make today the first day I am committed to making this thing work. For years I have been asked, begged and pleaded with to write a book on my experiences surviving cancer and subsequesnt bone marrow transplant.

As I am rolling up on 8 YEARS since that time and reflecting, I thought today is the day! Mainly because I look back on 8 years and think...big deal? What have I accomplished SINCE my life took a totally different and unexpected path? Well, I'm here to tell you - gobs and gobs of blessings have been bestowed upon me for which I am eternally grateful!

Keep an eye out here as I outline some of the amazing things God has donei n my life, how my non traditional family is a blessing and that a camera can be a tool in healing! It is going to be amazing to dig into all the details. So, if you need a little pick me up (or at times a big ol sobby cry out) look no further than here with HOPE in HAND!

:)nattie